Thrive Like a Mother Podcast
I'm Ebony and I'm a mama to 3 beautiful souls. I'm learning how navigate my trauma healing while building the life I never dreamed was possible. I'm a survivor of childhood abuse and for the longest time, I believed that if anyone knew my story, I wouldn't be worthy of love. Many years later and now I know that it far from the truth.
On the Thrive Like a Mother podcast, I'll share the resources and tools I use on the daily to cultivate a healthy mindset break the wheel of survival. Here we're about honesty and transparency. Because at the root of it all, my purpose in creating this podcast is so that you know you are never alone in your journey.
There may be laughter, there may be tears and we'll do it all by linking arms and learning to thrive together.
Thrive Like a Mother Podcast
Grace in the Messy Middle with Tahis Blue
What if the bravest thing you do today is tell the truth about how you’re really doing?
This conversation with Tahis Blue traces a powerful arc from survival mode to self-trust, guided by breathwork, community, and the unglamorous courage to keep going when life feels stacked against you. We sit with processing ambiguous grief after COVID, the shock of becoming a parent under lockdown, and the lingering loops of fear that won’t let go. Then we map steady ways forward that actually hold up in real life.
Tai shares her midlife reclamation with radical clarity: the tools that helped her reintegrate into the world, the moments her children became mirrors for unfinished wounds, and the practices that rewired her nervous system to feel safe again.
Breathwork for Tai has become more than a technique; it’s become a homecoming for the body and a daily reset for an overstimulated mind. We talk about learning to ask for help when family support shifts, and how fitness serves as a low-friction training ground for resilience. Some days you lift heavy, some days you sit on the bench and breathe, and both count.
This is a story about rebuilding without an audience. It’s honest conversations with people who “get it,” choosing safe listeners who don’t shrink your truth, and letting community remind you that you belong here as you are. It’s parenting with open eyes, modeling repair over perfection, and trusting that the answers you seek are already in your heart.
If you’re tired, if you’re tender, if you’ve come too far to quit now, this episode offers tools you can use today and a voice that says keep going.
Connect with Tai on Instagram @buildwithtai for resources and to be the first to hear when her breathwork community, Breath Lab, opens.
Thank you so much for listening in! If this episode spoke to you, it would mean the world to me if you left a review or shared it with a friend. And don’t forget to tag me so I can personally thank you for helping me spread the word.
Follow and chat with me on Instagram:
Podcast account - @thrivelikeamother.podcast
Personal account - @thrive.empowered
Sending you light and love always!
A lot of the things that I have rediscovered about myself are actually or even become aware of myself are actually painful things that I maybe just suppressed and didn't pay much attention to. I think when you live a busy life, especially when you have one, two, three, multiple children, you don't really have time to, you don't really have time to sit and think and feel and process and do all the things. I think there are a lot of ways that I have shown up in my life, um, my relationship, my marriage even, that weren't the most empowered version of me, that weren't the most worthy version of me.
SPEAKER_00:Hey love, I'm Abony and welcome to Thrive Like a Mother. On this podcast, we're scared for our truth, but that fear is what feebles us to truly live. You're in the right place if you feel like you're stuck in survival mode and you're ready to step into who you would truly meant to be. I'll share resources and tools I use daily to help you in your journey with a healthier mindset and to break the wheel of survival. The journey may not be easy, but you won't have to face it alone. I'm a mama of three healing day by day from past trauma, and I'm on a mission to build a life I've always dreamed of, but never thought was possible. So love, if you're ready to believe in what's possible, let's ling arms and thrive together. Welcome to the Thrive Like a Mother podcast. So I want to start off straight from the get-go. When I ask you about your current season of life, you said you've come too far to quit now. Let's let's talk, let's jump straight into it and talk about what that means for you.
SPEAKER_01:Yes. Okay. Well, first, thank you for even inviting me to be on your pod your podcast. That means a lot to me. This season, I know you know, you hear about eras that women go on, self-love era and all the things. And I'm I really don't have a theme for it other than it, it it is hard, but it has been harder. And I know that if I could have gotten through the past five years, I can get through the next six months or the next year. Um, so I think COVID is a thing that maybe we have talked about too much a lot, but honestly, I don't know if my life has ever been the same since COVID. No. Anybody anybody's has, if we're honest, right? So I had my baby, my daughter who is now five. I still call her my baby.
SPEAKER_00:Yes.
SPEAKER_01:Um, two weeks after we went, we shut down here in Maryland. And I still ask myself why God thought I was the best choice to be a mom of three and to become a mom of three under such harsh conditions.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So goodness. Okay. So let's talk through some more of that because I know, like you said, COVID changed us all. Like it changed us as parents. It changed our kids, the way they're growing up in the world now. How did you coming coming out of that experience, how did you navigate that change, knowing that okay, nothing is ever gonna be the same after this experience? Especially previously already having two kids, right? Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Such a good question because I think in my mind, COVID as a an era or a time was longer than it actually was in my mind. So I got stuck in a loop of thoughts. Yeah. Outside of the what I will call the traumatic experience of all things COVID, right? Um, and I think the best thing I could have done for myself during it was to keep showing up as little or as much as I could for myself. So through exercise, through journaling, through, you know, profession professional development, things like that, because that was something that I had to hold on to throughout. But then also something that I had to kind of re-ground me when I realized I have to change my thinking around what life can be now, because we're not in that space anymore, if that makes any sense. Um I had I had a hard time even reintegrating with the world and a little what I would almost call PTSD, where like if the kids cough, I'm like, no, no, no, they can't go to school, they'll infect the whole school. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like there's just little subtle ways where it still shows up in my life five years later. But I definitely would say the biggest thing for me to kind of come out of it was just self-awareness, just being aware of what I was thinking and what I was feeling, and if it was moving me forward or keeping me stuck. Yeah. And then realizing that it was kind of keeping me stuck, figuring out how to get out of that mental space. Yes.
SPEAKER_00:I almost feel like, especially for coming out of that time period, it felt like almost like a rebirth for all of us because we had to learn, like you said, like how to now just be in this new space, in this new world that, you know, is forever changed.
SPEAKER_01:For sure. And I think it was a grieving too, like a yes. And grieving of what life was before, who you were before, who your family was before, and understanding that that is it's okay that you are in a grief. It feels weird. It's like this ambiguous grief. It feels very strange, but allowing it to be okay that you do have that grief.
SPEAKER_00:Yes.
SPEAKER_01:For that. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Absolutely. All right. So for y'all listening in who are meeting Ty for the very first time, y'all, she's an army veteran turned personal trainer, group fitness instructor, and y'all, double, double certified breath work coach. And we're gonna get into that a little bit later about your breath work. But she's also now, y'all, she's training to become a Pilates instructor. As you've heard, she's a mama of three, and she's also host of the podcast Build with Ty. And I think really what I love most about Thai story is how she's taken just every chapter that has been painful in her life, and she's turned it around to not only help herself rebuild, but also help other women learn how they can rebuild mind, body, and soul. Um, and so you've walked through, you walked through so many transitions, right? Motherhood, grief, emotional healing, even some of what you've shared with me, like you said, within the past five years. What did rebuilding look like for you just in real time?
SPEAKER_01:Hmm. Well, I think if I'm honest, I'm still in kind of a rebuilding phase. I call this my midlife reclamation. But I think some of the very important tools in this particular season of rebuilding um are the breath work.
SPEAKER_00:Yes.
SPEAKER_01:For me, breath work has really opened me up to myself and helped me understand what's true for me and bridge the gap between what I'm thinking, what I'm feeling, and understand how those two things are interrelated and connected.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:So that piece having real, honest, and sometimes extremely challenging conversations with the people in my life who have a major impact on my life and my day-to-day existence. Um, but then also being in community with people who are doing similar work and want to do the similar things and and have similar transformations. So I would say those those three things. Being being able to access my authentic self through just being still in breath work and then sharing that outwardly, and then finding people who get it. Finding being with people and in community with people who I would say get it. Get it is just the easiest way to say what I don't know how to say.
SPEAKER_00:That makes no, it makes sense a hundred percent to me. I feel like I say that all the time. Like even with you have to find your circle that just understands. For sure. Because not everybody is going to, right? And like that's that's okay. But if you have your circle, you can feel supported. For sure. Yeah. So, y'all, one of my favorite parts about Ties Platform, she's always reminded me to breathe. Y'all, it's it's so simple, right? It feels like even my meditation this morning, it was like, you know, that one thing that just your body does automatically. But if you take a moment to do that with intention, right? There's there's just there's magic, there's a shift that happens within yourself to just reset everything. So I want to I want to talk about you've shared like three just powerful tools with our listeners already. Are there any parts of yourself through doing those those tools and those activities that you have been able to rediscover new parts of yourself lately?
SPEAKER_01:Hmm. So interesting because listening to you say that even that I am an army veteran, even though I know I'm an army veteran, veteran, hearing someone else say it is like, wow, you did, you you did do that. Yes. You know, and then remembering all the things that came along with making that choice. Well, if I'm honest, a lot of the things that I have rediscovered about myself are actually, or even become aware of myself, are actually painful things that I maybe just suppressed and didn't pay much attention to. I think when you live a busy life, especially when you have one, two, three, multiple children, you don't really have time to, you don't really have time to sit and think and feel and process and and do all the things. So I think there are a lot of ways that I have shown up in my life, um, my relationship, my marriage, even, that weren't the most empowered version of me, that weren't the most worthy version of me. So yeah, I think honestly, the biggest revelations I've had were the ways that I wasn't fulfilling my greatest potential. I even joined the army because, not because I was this brave person and I wanted to fight these battles, but honestly because I was kind of tired of quitting on myself. Yeah. You know, in college, I left because the money was a little bit, money was a little funny and I went to work. And I don't know, I was just kind of tired of that struggle between where to spend the. I was just tired of quitting on myself and tired of being unclear. And I was like, you know what? Joining the army is a brave choice that will get my bills paid and and help me figure out a path forward. So just the biggest thing was just understanding why I've made the moves that I've made. Deep, deep understanding of why I've done the things that I've done. And then kind of forgive myself for maybe not meeting my fullest potential, but also being very compassionate and honoring the version of myself who was just doing the best I could with what I knew. Yeah. And surviving at that time. So I think now this reclamation is like, okay, now you know these things. What are what are we going to do now? What are we doing next?
SPEAKER_00:Yes.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. Exactly.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah. Exactly. Do you remember? Because it sounds to me like you you had a moment um where you had the realization that you had either lost your voice or lost yourself in just being and doing. Do you remember what that moment was? And then like what helped you be like, okay, no, we're we're moving differently. That's so good.
SPEAKER_01:I don't know if I could say I had a moment, but I will tell you, my teenager, so my oldest daughter is 15. When she was in middle school, so she's 10th grade now, so I would say seventh, eighth grade, she was having a really, really hard time with everything. Yeah her friends, her grades, her hair, everything. And I think I realized, hmm, this is about the time when I started to have these messages as well, right? And our lives look very different. You know, my parents were divorced. I have, you know, a little bit of trauma with that. And so her life is a lot different, but the things that we experience in our seasons of life and and human development are very similar. And I think seeing her believe some of the messaging that I would say, like, that's a lie. Make sure you tell yourself that that's not true. I know that's what you're thinking, but tell yourself that that is not true. Like, start having those types of conversations. I think that woke me up to the need for me to heal the wounds from 30, 25, 30 years ago. I don't want to show up for my kids as the same wounded thir 13-year-old. And the fact that I can viscerally remember things the way that she's going through them in the same ways. I'm like, yeah, it's time, it's time. Yeah. Yeah. That's it's like that. Oh, that's still there. Yeah. You didn't know it was still there, but it is. The healing, the healing journey that I've been on, I've been very, you know, and not not all the parts, and I and I'm very um appropriate with how I share and and her level of under understanding, but I share it with her as I'm growing through it. And it has been so powerful for her as she navigates her friendships and relationships and her identity and her relationship with herself. And I'm just so it just makes me so thankful that that I had that awakening. So I don't like I said, I don't think it was a moment, but I think over time just observing what was going on with my with my family. Yes.
SPEAKER_00:I love that. Especially especially our kids. There's that that quote of that um, you know, kids, especially if you're a woman and you have girls. It's like they they hold up a mirror to you and you're like, oh, there's some things I have not dealt with that I probably should, you know, at this point in my life. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:That was it. So it's definitely um my oldest for that. And then my my youngest is my patience. Like she triggers every every trigger. That five-year-old is like ping, ping, ping, ping, ping. So she definitely helps me understand. She has been the the catalyst in me understanding my nervous system better and how I respond to overstimulation and you know, how I respond to perceived threat and things like that. So the bookend girls have definitely fueled um my journey for sure. Oh.
SPEAKER_00:Goodness. Okay, Ty, what would you tell the woman who's listening right now and she's in a season where she feels like she's stuck, or she's in that season where things are just like compounding. It's like, okay, what am I gonna have to deal with next? What would you tell that woman?
SPEAKER_01:Hmm. The first thing I'm going to say is give yourself grace. And it's so funny that five is the biblical number of grace. Five has been a huge number for me over the past five years. So it's very funny to me that grace is now coming up in this conversation five years into my um what I'm going to call my healing journey, but have grace for yourself and take take time to really be still with yourself so you can understand what you're feeling and what is real and what is not. I think a lot of times when we get stuck, it's because we have so many different messages coming from so many different places. We can't even really truly hear ourselves. And we don't even really truly know what is real and what's not real and what matters and what doesn't matter. So I think the biggest thing is just being willing to be honest with yourself about what you want, you know, about what you don't want, about what hurts, about what feels good. I think being honest with ourselves can sometimes be the hardest.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:But then once you're once you feel like you're truly getting honest and things are really coming through for you in that authentic way, share it with somebody. Share it with someone you trust so that they can help you help kind of sometimes we it's tricky because sometimes you think something is real, but if you share it with the wrong person, they will shut you down. Yeah. No, no, no, no, no. Put that away. Don't let's not, right? And so I think you really need to talk to somebody who you know who you know you can trust that really has your best interest in mind for their own, right? They don't they don't see your truth as a threat to themselves. Yeah, I think that's really important. Yeah, that's powerful. Yeah, people will keep you stuck if you're sure.
SPEAKER_00:That's true. That's true. Yeah. Goodness. Okay, so what is what is one recent hard thing that you face that you feel like stretched your capacity, but also helped you just kind of grow in turn?
SPEAKER_01:I'm gonna share this with and I think that I am over the hump of it where it's not um as much of an emotional trigger. But my mother moved away um in 2023. When April, May we'll be on, we'll be at three years. So 2023, she packed up all her stuff, sold some of her stuff, gave me her house plants, and moved clear across the country. Wow. And it was devastating for me. So many things came up, so many old wounds, and I never really realized that that was a whole other area of grief that I had to deal with. But I also had guilt dealing with that grief. Um, but I think it grew me in such a way that I realized even without that help and that support, I'm still able to make things happen. Yes. I just can't do it the way honestly, with her not being here, I realized I don't have to do it the way she wants me to, because start coming our own way and coming in and saying, Oh, is this how you've designed your house? Or is this how this isn't clean, or you know what I mean? Some of the things that we really are worried about our mothers judging us about. Yeah. But it definitely opened my eyes to my own capacity. You know, I don't have her to help me pick up the kids or do certain things or or come over and keep the kids so that I can go out and things like that. So it opened me up to it opened me up to being able to ask for help.
SPEAKER_00:Oh, that's a big one for me. Yes.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. Not having mama mom and being able to call her when I needed her to pick up my oldest from her activities or come over to the house so that I could go to a job, or my husband and I could go out or whatever, really forced me to figure out other ways to ask for help. So that was a big one. My mom also was never a big ask of help. So I kept myself stuck in that story. Well, my mom didn't have to ask for help. Why should I have to ask for help? Then she left, and I think it was it was a blessing in disguise. Yeah. So I think in the biggest, in the biggest way, it showed me that it's okay to let people show up for you when you need it. Yes.
SPEAKER_00:Yes. But something I'm constantly reminding myself is that I don't have to be superwoman. Do not have to be that, you know, all of the times. Sometimes, you know, we need help too. We need it. Okay. So how time how do you right now, how do you personally prepare to face challenges? And I know that that can be a tough question because sometimes you don't know when the challenge is coming, right? But how do you, how do you stay ready? Maybe that's how do you stay ready for things that are gonna come up in our lives?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, that's good. I think the biggest I I use fit my fitness journey as the lowest hanging fruit to get through challenges. And it's not just, you know, the lifting weights, picking up heavy things and putting heavy things down. It's really the scheduling around it, the recovery around it, your mindset around it. You know, when I'm working out with my kids at home, it's like the being patient around it, being okay with it being 20 minutes rather than the 60 minutes that I had planned. So I think I think I stay ready for hard things just by showing up for hard things and the mental capacity that I've built around that. That's the that's I don't know any other other way than just show showing up to work out. I show up to work out and sometimes I'm super, super strong, and sometimes I I'm here and I'm just gonna sit on this bench.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:And if something comes out, then fine. And if it doesn't, at least I try it, right?
SPEAKER_00:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, I think it's just controlling what you can control and like I like I say, about everything, listening to yourself, listen to your body and figure out what feels good in that moment.
SPEAKER_00:I love that. I love that. Well, I see you've built, you've been able to build such a beautiful community and just have been involved in some beautiful communities. What is something that community has taught you about healing and resilience? Wow.
SPEAKER_01:The biggest thing community has taught me about about healing is we all have something to offer. We all have a voice that needs to be heard, all of us. All of our stories, all of our experiences, all of our tragedies, our triumphs. We all have a story. We can all inspire each other. Um and I think I know that my sharing my story has inspired and encouraged someone else to share their theirs. And I think community just kind of shows you that you're not alone. You are supported, and it allows you to see where other people have found the courage and found the strength. It allows you to be inspired and it allows you to find your voice amongst amongst other people, right? Yeah. Especially as someone who so I I grew up in Baltimore City, which if you've ever seen The Wire, it's the city. Yeah. And I I moved, my mom moved us out to what we call the county here, which is like 30 minutes away. And I everything was different. I talked different, I dressed different. I never really felt like I fit in anywhere. I didn't really know how I should talk or how I should be as a human being. And I think when that is how you kind of grow up, it sticks with you for a long time. And I think finding community is a place where you can finally just relax and breathe and just be yourself.
SPEAKER_00:Yes. Yes. You don't have to be like, oh, how should I show up in this room at this certain time? No, just just be you. Just be you at all work out. That's so good.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, I think that's the biggest thing with community is like settle in. You you're welcome here. You belong here. You don't have to be you don't have to wear a mask or or be someone you don't hear. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Yes. I love that.
unknown:All right.
SPEAKER_00:Well, Ty, if you could leave the women that are listening today with one affirmation or truth that is guiding you right now, what would that be?
SPEAKER_01:Oh my gosh. The biggest, the biggest truth is that everything, I want to say this in the most profound way, but it's gonna come out the only way I know how to say it. Everything that you want and need is available to you. Every question that you have can be answered if you listen to your heart. And if you feel stuck, I promise you that your honesty is is in your heart, and your honesty is the best way to be free.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:So I don't know if that's an affirmation, but no, I'm I'm holding on to that one. Yeah. I don't I don't know if it's an affirmation, but I think we the answers are with the answers are within us.
SPEAKER_00:Yes, and if they're already there.
SPEAKER_01:There is no other time, no better time than this very time to get clear on those answers.
SPEAKER_00:Yes. And just trust. I love that you through our whole conversation, just be honest with yourself, y'all. Just be honest. Don't listen to he said, she said, they're saying, what do you say? What do you say?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, even what your mama said 50 40 years ago. Yeah, it was important, but it maybe doesn't apply anymore.
SPEAKER_00:Yes, yes. I love that. Let's thank you for bringing your full heart to this conversation. I think you have right reminded me and then just so many of us listening that even the middle, the hard, the messy, we're still becoming, we're still here. Um, and like you said, I'm gonna say it back. You've come too far to quit now. You've come too far to quit now. That is a message. I think every single mama listening into this right now, like we all need to hear it. Um, so I want to share some ways, share some ways that they can stay connected with you on social media.
SPEAKER_01:Yes. So I am on all my social media platforms as BuildWith Build with Tie. Really just Instagram right now. I don't use TikTok at all because you know how we can get into that rabbit hole. Soon, very soon, I will be le releasing my breathwork community. It's going to be called the Breath Lab. I'm super excited about it. I hope to have it released by the end of the year. So I will keep you abreast of that on Instagram and social media. But anywhere that I am available is going to be at Bill with Tie.
SPEAKER_00:Yes. Thank you. I can't wait to plug into that breathwork community. I need. All right, y'all. Well, until next time, remember your growth takes grace and you've already come so much further than you think. Yes.
SPEAKER_01:Thank you, Ebony. You're welcome.
SPEAKER_00:Thank you so much for listening, love. If anything in today's episode resonated with you, share it with your bestie or share it on social media and tag me so we can chat about it. As always, sending you light and love. And remember, you are worthy, you are enough, and you deserve to thrive.
