Thrive Like a Mother Podcast
I'm Ebony and I'm a mama to 3 beautiful souls. I'm learning how navigate my trauma healing while building the life I never dreamed was possible. I'm a survivor of childhood abuse and for the longest time, I believed that if anyone knew my story, I wouldn't be worthy of love. Many years later and now I know that it far from the truth.
On the Thrive Like a Mother podcast, I'll share the resources and tools I use on the daily to cultivate a healthy mindset break the wheel of survival. Here we're about honesty and transparency. Because at the root of it all, my purpose in creating this podcast is so that you know you are never alone in your journey.
There may be laughter, there may be tears and we'll do it all by linking arms and learning to thrive together.
Thrive Like a Mother Podcast
Making relationships your biggest flex
Relationship intelligence isn't just a skill—it's the foundation of a thriving life as a mother, partner, and woman. In this raw conversation, relationship coach Jasmine Cruz shares her remarkable journey. From being kicked out at 17 for being part of the LGBTQ+ community to becoming the founder of LoveTank, where she helps women transform their relationships from survival to strength.
"Your voice is your power," Jasmine reminds us, challenging the notion that motherhood means losing yourself. Instead, she reframes this transition as a transformation: "We're not losing our voice. We're trying to figure out a new way to speak." This perspective shift alone can revolutionize how mothers navigate their changing identities and relationships after children.
Drawing from both personal experience and professional expertise, Jasmine unpacks why communication breakdowns happen and offers practical strategies for having those difficult conversations that most of us avoid. She dismantles the myth that strong relationships don't include conflict: "You will have arguments. You will have disagreements...but how you navigate that in a form of conversation is key." Her Power of Conversations Bootcamp teaches exactly this—how to turn ordinary relationships into extraordinary ones through better communication.
Whether you're struggling with a particular relationship or simply want to strengthen your connections across the board, Jasmine's practical wisdom offers a roadmap to not just survive but truly thrive. Follow @LiveLoveTank on all platforms to continue learning how to make relationships your biggest flex.
Thank you so much for listening in! If anything in this episode resonated with you, it would mean the world to me if you left a review or shared it with a friend or on social media.
And don't forget to tag me so I can personally thank you for helping me get the word out.
Follow and chat with me on Instagram:
Podcast account - @thrivelikeamother.podcast
Personal account - @thrive.empowered
Sending you light and love always!
Hey, love, I'm Ebony and welcome to Thrive Like a Mother On this podcast. We're scared for our truth, but that fear is what fuels us to truly live in it. You're in the right place if you feel like you're stuck in survival mode and you're ready to step into who you were truly meant to be. I'll share resources and tools I use daily to help you in your journey towards a healthier mindset and to break the wheel of survival. The journey may not be easy, but you won't have to face it alone. I'm a mama of three, healing day by day from past trauma, and I'm on a mission to build a life I've always dreamed of but never thought was possible. So, love, if you're ready to believe in what's possible, let's link arms and thrive together. Hey, loves, I'm so excited for y'all to listen in to this next guest interview, the woman I'm about to have on here. I hope y'all are ready and locked in because she's about to drop some gems for you.
Speaker 1:Her name is Jasmine Cruz. She's a relationship coach. She's also the founder of Love Tank, and her mission is to help people make relationships their biggest flex. And as the founder of Love Tank, she helps women learn how to, you know, basically develop their own relationship intelligence, communicate with confidence and creating content in a course called the Power of Conversations Bootcamp. You're going to hear about it in this episode and how to access it, but it really does get down to the core of becoming a better communicator and being confident in it. She offers a range of different coaching experiences that really are designed to help make relationships and the growth of them more accessible, relatable and empowering for anyone she comes in contact with. She took from her very own personal experiences to establish the foundation for relationship resilience and she shares those gems with y'all. As a coach and on this episode, honestly y'all. Her journey was not easy. She was kicked out at 17 for being part of the LGBT community and Jasmine literally she built her life from the ground up, so she really understands firsthand the power of connection, self-worth and really healing through conversation. And now y'all, with all that she's been through, she's really dedicated in giving others the tools that she wished that she had and really helping them learn to turn their love into their greatest strength and not their biggest struggle.
Speaker 1:And so I hope y'all are ready, tuned in, get cozy on the couch, get your favorite warm drink ready and tap in to hear Jasmine. She's got, like I said, a lot of gems to drop for y'all. And you are going to want to listen in and laugh? Hey y'all. And you are going to want to listen in and lock in, hey y'all.
Speaker 1:Welcome to another episode of the Thrive Like a Mother podcast, and I'm super excited because today, not only do we have our first in-person podcast, but the person that's on here with me today, jasmine y'all, when I tell you she has been in my life since Ebony, was like little bitty adult, young adult, baby and, honestly, when I first met her, I was just at the start of my corporate career and she mentored me and mentored so many other people and then locked in, stayed in my life, yes, and would not change a thing.
Speaker 1:So today, as we have her on the podcast, we're going to talk about something that really every mother needs in their toolkit, and that's relationship intelligence Period. Really, how mastering it not only transforms your partnerships, but really how you decide to show up in every room as a mother, as a wife, as a partner, whatever role you have, it shifts everything. And so, get cozy, this is going to be a conversation that both your heart and mind need, and so, jasmine, I really want you to take us back really to the beginning. People need to hear what led you into this work of helping people grow in their relationships and have strong foundations in them.
Speaker 2:Well, first of all, we're going to go way back back in the time. So I've always been the type of person that wanted to help somebody. I grew up in an environment where help was extended to me and it just came naturally. It wasn't anything that I just planned, it was just like oh, I've been through certain things in my life. I've always had a resilient personality, so it was just kind of easy for me to just slide into helping other people.
Speaker 2:Now, mind you, I didn't know that I was necessarily helping other people. So like, for instance, when I met you, we were in a corporate environment, yeah, and it was just something I enjoyed to do. Like I seen people that needed something and I didn't necessarily know what you needed per se. It was just let me talk through certain things with this person or whoever the case. You know whoever it was in that specific time. But I wasn't like looking for to help anybody.
Speaker 2:In my young adult life, in high school and grade school, I always been that person, but it wasn't like I just was looking to do it for a living. It kind of just was something that happened for me. And now we have, you know, me teaching other women how to become relationally intelligent. It's just something like you know, when they say it's either a will or a skill, this is more so probably a life skill that I have. Skill this is more so probably a life skill that I have, and I just amplify that and enjoy talking to other people, specifically women, about ways that they can change their life dynamics.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 1:I love that and I like how you talk about, how you know it's not something that you were seeking, it's something that really got placed in you, is it? Yeah, oh yeah, this is a part of you and it just it came out naturally, so I love that. Let's talk about you, talk about your young, your young adult life. Let's talk about your story Very pivotal part about being kicked out at 17 years old. Let's talk about how that brought you resilience, how you rebuilt from that and like what role the relationships you started gaining, how that helped you in your healing.
Speaker 2:So it's really ironic that you bring that up, because that was such a long time ago for me and now that I am transitioning into being a mother that moment has resurfaced. So I haven't talked about it at all, just kind of briefly to some friends and family about what I've been going through.
Speaker 2:But, yes, I was kicked out at 17 for being gay and it was a pivotal moment because I didn't know what the heck I was doing. I'm like such a young girl, naive, very much grew up in the church, very much sheltered, very much cultured in the Latino culture, african-american culture. I was cultured, I was sheltered. I was like culture. I was cultured, I was sheltered. I was like I didn't know a lot about life. Yeah, so when this happened to me, I literally had to survive and fend for myself and this is not for the weak.
Speaker 2:What I went through and what many other people have probably gone through when they were displaced because there was a disagreement between your parents or whatever it could be any traumatic or trauma-led event. Mine just so happened to be being gay, being homosexual, being kicked out of the church, being kicked out of my house, my mother's house, and it changed my life my house, my mother's house, and it changed my life. So most people look at that and say, okay, this is trauma. I, for those who know, no, I do not live my life based on trauma. Traumatic things have happened, but I don't stay there and so I am probably that 99, like that 1% out of 99%. That's going to be like okay and yeah you know it's kind of harsh.
Speaker 2:You know my coaching style I'm going to be all that. She does not play. Okay, she does not. I'm like, okay, this happened and yeah, so that experience shaped me. That experience was not only traumatic, but it definitely showed me who people are, and when they show you who they are, believe them, because you don't know when it's going to come back around.
Speaker 1:So let me fast forward.
Speaker 2:I am expecting a son, my son. My wife is carrying him and I'm so excited Me too, girl. Oh my God, I'm so excited. I have been an auntie, a God mom. I've been everything for other people's children and I have not been afforded the opportunity to be a mother. So this experience has brought that same energy from 17 back into my life, and most people would want me to share the story, and you know out the people that are not involved or not accepting of my child. One thing for sure I'm not going to play about my baby. So that experience has resurfaced, and so the reason why I talk a lot about relational intelligence is because if I wasn't relationally intelligent, what has been presented to me, it would have went a different direction. But because I'm emotionally and relationally intelligent and educated about how to navigate relationships is why I'm able to navigate this experience with the same individual that is not wanting to be a part of our lives anymore because we're having a son.
Speaker 1:Wow, wow.
Speaker 2:I haven't said it out loud in public.
Speaker 1:So well y'all heard it. Yeah, I know a lot of mothers on that listen to us Like they, they understand, like when it comes to our kids, there's nothing, nobody that can you know, break any type of barrier or stop you from protecting, like your child, like we. We all understand that. So we're talking about how powerful it is to be emotionally and relationally intelligent. Let's talk about some everyday ways that maybe moms struggle in relationships, like with their partners, their families. How can relationship, intelligence and building that skill help them?
Speaker 2:So, okay, so I've been with my spouse for 17 years. We clearly have not had children up until this moment. My son is not here yet. He will be here soon, in like a month, and then I will experience some of the things that the ladies that listen to your podcast have experienced. The only difference is I've done a lot of pre-work, okay, so I've done a lot of healing. I've done a lot of healing. I've done a lot of hard conversations. I've done a lot of the work that people typically do when children are already here. I've done that prior to having.
Speaker 2:I'm not saying that, oh, my level of relational intelligence is more superior than the next woman, but what I will say is I did work, pre-work that most women have not done, and so, to answer your question, it's like if you want to be in a certain space, number one, which I talk about all the time, is communication. It is the number one issue that we have in any level of relationship, even communicating with our children. So I can only speak to my godchildren, because that's who I have trained up to be relationally intelligent, them little babies. They know love tank. They know everything about what I'm going to say before I say it, when it comes to being intelligent relationally and I started really young because when you know there's a lot of different dynamics that that they're involved in that I kind of want to shape, shift and have my hands in so that they can be the best that they can be, not just as a cousin to my child, but just in life, yeah, as a human, as a human being, and that's really what it's about. Um, so communication would be number one.
Speaker 2:Communication is one of the hardest things for us to really grasp. Um, I'm not saying it's the easiest thing, but once you can get a handle on it, you can be able to navigate and negate issues, not saying that there won't be any issues because there will be. Yeah, there will be, it's going to happen. It will happen, yeah, it's just how, in which way you change the conversation to your benefit relationally. Yeah, if that's between you and your spouse, you and your family, you and your children, because conversations will have to be had and hard ones will have to be had in each dynamic. So ultimately, that would be the one and done for me is just communication. There's other things, but if you are able to focus on the communicational piece, then other things will be a lot easier to navigate, that's true. So let me ask you a lot easier to navigate, that's true. So let me ask you, since you already have children what are?
Speaker 1:some of the things that you feel or find that I would say definitely with having kids, their, their emotional levels change so much throughout the years like Olivia at three years old is not the same Olivia I'm dealing with right now at seven, and so you have to be able to kind of watch them in a way that you can adapt and say, okay, this is what age they're at now, this is how I can communicate with her, this is what she understands, this is what she doesn't understand, and actually kids understand a lot more than you think they do.
Speaker 1:But being able to navigate and understand. Okay, this is the age that she's at, thinking back maybe even how were you when you were seven years old? You know what were you thinking, what were your feelings and things like that. And so when she comes to me, you know starting to and build those moments of conversations with her, asking her really every day like how's things going on at school, starting that earlier than you think, because, believe it or not, they start going through stuff in first grade, you know, with other students or teachers or just feelings that they're having, especially like with siblings. That's another dynamic that I'm learning that I did not know because I didn't grow up with my kids, um.
Speaker 1:So yeah, it's. It's been helpful for me to just view the conversations that I have with her in a different way. And then, of course, obviously, as Jade and Henry get older, yeah, same thing with them. Yeah, yeah, wow, yeah, wow.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I didn't have any. Well, I had siblings, but they weren't like my blood siblings. Um, I had two amazing sisters that lived across the hall from me. Their mother is my godmother. She ultimately raised me as well, and then I had, and she has two girls, and so, although I was a single, a single child in my mother's house, I had the privilege of growing up in an environment that was very untraditional, and so I had my dad, which he's not my birth father, but he's my dad since I was five, and he has kids, and his wife has a daughter. So I have siblings, yeah, and I'm not really all about blood or not blood. I didn't grow up like that. I grew up very untraditional, I grew up thinking that these people were my real siblings and is so I kind of have a single child mindset slash siblings. It's just really weird. But I'm curious to see how my son's name is Chrome.
Speaker 2:I'm curious to see what Chrome is all about, who he is, and I've read the five love languages for children prior.
Speaker 1:I still need to read that that pre-work.
Speaker 2:I got a whole course on it Pre-work, just to understand. And one thing that stuck out to me about that book is that the one to five years, it's all five.
Speaker 2:Love languages, it's words of affirmation, it's physical touch, it's acts of service, it's all of that. And I created a little workbook for kids based on that theory of incorporating everyday five love languages for kids. And I did do that with my God kids. And I feel like that is very important because when I started Love Tank and I started to really get into more of the coaching space, it really was about the five love languages for adults and that's how. And then I would just you know, oh, words of affirmation. But then I realized, after reading the children's version later, we need to incorporate all five period. Yeah, all five period.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it doesn't matter what your top or you know Exactly yeah.
Speaker 2:Definitely all aspects, all aspects in multiple phases of life, not just, you know, when things get hard or which most of us. That's really what people seek more information is when things are hard. It's not when it's not the maintenance of the children, or the maintenance of your relationship, or your marriage or parenting, or whatever the case is. And I'm going to just stop there, because you know I can get a whole and a whole nother thing about maintenance yes.
Speaker 1:Yes, OK, so we're talking about Croom. You're prepping to welcome baby boy into the world, into your family. How has what you know now started to really shape how you're going to show up?
Speaker 2:as a mom. Everybody knows me as CJ's wife, everybody knows me as the God mom, everybody knows me as a sibling, you know, as the woman of love tank, and nobody has seen me as the mother, because I'm the mother.
Speaker 2:I'm a mother, okay, I'm a mother as soon as chrome started being built. Um, so for me, being and I'm going to keep saying this relationally intelligent. Relationally intelligent because that that means what it means for you is going to be different from what it means to me, because who I show up as a woman, how I show up as a woman in this world, um, for me it's just being the best version of myself. For him, um, spiritually, emotionally available, and who he sees me as with his mother, his other mother, yes, because I'm mommy, she's mom, I'm mommy.
Speaker 2:But it's very important when you see okay, let me pause for a second when you see my wife and I there is undoubtedly a word I feel like I've heard that before Undoubtedly you will see pure love. Pure love when you see us, when you know us, when you have experienced us. Love is the one thing that you can't deny. No matter what we've gone through and, trust me, we've gone through things, through things. Love is who we are. And when I think about God's love, I am so grateful that I am embodying nothing compared to God's love, but I am embodying love. So my son can see love. I didn't really see that in my primary health, and so it's very important for me to exude that for him.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And all of the other things you know. I think the main thing that I am very proud of is to show up, yeah, and healing is always, ever evolving. So before, okay, so when you offered me to come to the podcast, I would have said I'm healed. My relationships are my biggest flex. Let me talk about this relationship with my mom. Let me talk about this relationship with my wife and talk about the relationship until life.
Speaker 2:Life and most people are used to me not having a lot of relational issues. I'm dealing with one right now and it's very interesting to utilize the skills that I have taught others and have to use in myself in a moment where happiness it should be the only thing that I'm experiencing. So now I show up to the podcast knowing that healing is always, ever evolving. It's not just oh, I am healed because I was healed from certain things, and I will say I'm still healed from the same things, but I have to navigate that a little bit differently. Something new, something very new and not foreign because I've experienced it before. So for Chrome, he gets to experience the healed version of where I am today.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I love that.
Speaker 2:And, yes, I'm excited, I'm elated, I am so grateful to God for the opportunity to be a mother. That's first and foremost because people don't know. You know. People often want to know. You know why is she caring and not you? And they want to know all of these questions.
Speaker 1:They want to know all the business.
Speaker 2:And then we had to. We had to grieve our relationship for 17 years because, yes, it's going to be different.
Speaker 1:It's so different. Yeah, like, and y'all are in, even watching y'all, like I think I'm just. I was talking to my therapist the other day. She's like oh, what examples do you have of love? And I was like I don't know, I didn't grow up seeing that. And then do you have of love? And I was like I don't know, I didn't grow up seeing that. And then I immediately it was like no, I got examples, I gotta see J and Jess. So, but yeah, just seeing y'all although I know, yes, it's gonna change your relationship, but y'all are in such a great place relationally like, yeah, y'all will be able to navigate all of it. It's really about alignment.
Speaker 2:It's about conversations around having to grieve I wouldn't say we, like I use the word grieve because it's very much relatable but we had to have conversations before, you know, when we found out, oh, we got the great news. And then we're like, oh, our life is going to change.
Speaker 2:It's going to be, our life is going to change, yeah, it's going to be our relationship is going to change and you know it will not be two of us anymore, It'll be three. And so having and it was a very emotional experience because you know it's like there's moments where I'm like I'm not the carrier Will I have a bond? You know, these are the things that you don't often talk through, um, because it's a lot of people don't really talk about the truth of the matter. You know who's caring and what that does to the relationship and how do people feel emotionally her feelings versus my feelings and so we had to talk all those things through and we're still talking those things through and everybody. It's more so about the joy and the glitz and the glam.
Speaker 2:But there are a lot of pre-work that you have to do, I think, for us, because we planned it. It wasn't, it's not like a surprise. So it is my due diligence. This is me being emotionally and relationally intelligent, meaning this is me being a responsible human being by making sure we're doing and having those conversations prior to his arrival. So we are prepared and she had to do her own work. Yeah, Okay, Her work is her work, my work is my work and our work is our work together. Does that make sense?
Speaker 1:Yeah, absolutely it's it's a lot.
Speaker 2:It's so many things. It's so many good things. It's just. It's just so many things you got to do yes.
Speaker 1:Okay, so we know a lot of our listeners probably have not done the pre-work, right. Me being one of them. I had not done the pre-work right. But I realized, okay, this is something that I need to take care of for my kids. Like there's, there's literally literally no. Like better late than never, like that, that's true, just do it. But how does someone know, um, that it's time to start doing that type of inner work? Like where do they have to be to say, okay, I need to take this step?
Speaker 2:So remember, just like briefly, when I was talking about maintenance yeah, so I don't feel like we. Okay, so your question is how would somebody know? I don't feel that people should have to know. I think it's just something that you should do, okay.
Speaker 2:I think it's just a matter of either you're going to do it or you're not. You don't need to arrive in this magical space and have this epiphany and say, hey, I need to start doing this. No, you need to do maintenance Period. These are things so okay In my world. We have the luxury of doing pre-work because we pre-plan, we have to do iuis, ivf, we have to do all of these things to you know, find a donor. All of you know all of these things that involved pre-work per se, whereas a heterosexual couple they, you know, you guys are intimate. You do your thing and then you have, oh, there's a baby. So it's different. So, whether you do pre-work while you're pregnant, it's still good, and if you do it after, it's still good work. It's still good work.
Speaker 2:But there should be some sort of some sort of urgency to make sure that the household is in order. Yeah, and and and. When I mean order, that's not saying, oh, everything needs to be in place or your life needs to be this. No, it's just doing the work little by little, every day, and whatever that looks like for you, because it's going to look different for everybody. But you need to do something. There has to be some sort of urgency for you to want to be better, do better, whatever the circumstances. Now pause, Most people may say, okay, well, my life isn't set up that way, but you got a phone.
Speaker 1:That's very true. You have a notes app.
Speaker 2:You have the same energy that you put in anything else in your life should be the same energy that you put into wanting to do quote-unquote pre-work. Pre is prior. Oh, look at me, I think I'm in college so you know, I've been thinking I know something pre is prior, but pre-post, whatever the case is, do the work is my point. Yeah, um, now, hopefully new moms that come to you would maybe interested in. Oh, what does pre-work process look like? And we can get into that at that time. But that's a service.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, Everything is. Let's talk about the power of a mom having her own voice. Talk about the power of a mom having her own voice, and this is something that I know maybe not all of us have experienced at some point. But having, you know, having a baby or having a baby brought into your life, that's a change, right. And so sometimes, during that transition there it's a transition, right, it's a transformation you might feel like gosh, I don't even know who I am anymore. Can you speak to those moms that feel like they have lost their voice, lost their way and kind of?
Speaker 2:don't know where to start, so I'm going to speak from a place of being a woman, and you know when I first met you, a woman, and you know when I first met you, that was something that I wanted you to understand from our first conversation was your voice. Most people feel as though that they don't have a voice in this world, and I know that even in the climate that we're in today, it's very hard to fathom.
Speaker 2:using your voice. Your voice is your power, right? And it's not that you just speak at a turn or you just speak frivolously. It's just about being able to articulate your needs, your wants, articulate your deepest desires in the way that you understand your communication style and how you communicate. Those things is your voice. So your question does not necessarily apply to me physically, because there's a physical experience that my wife will have that I will not experience because she is carrying our child and she will be birthing our child. And there is going to be a postpartum experience that I won't know anything about because I'm the supporter. So I can't necessarily speak to your voice. In the way, it's easy for me to say, yes, use your voice, have your voice, don't ever lose yourself. But I won't know what that is. I will know it more from a supportive standpoint.
Speaker 2:Physical element to having a baby that Every it's the experience is different for everybody. Now let me tell you I've been coached up. Yeah, I've been coached. Ok, I'm a good daddy. Yeah, love saying that because that's who I am. No, I'm just kidding. And I have been explained postpartum, depression, postpartum, and I've done so. This is again going back to pre-work, researching. You know what the possibilities are, what the possibilities can be. Who am I going to be for her as a support so that I mean naturally, yeah, our relationship's good, we're in alignment. We have all these conversations, we've done all this pre-work, but the reality is that physical element, that chemistry in the body, you can't deny is real.
Speaker 2:Your voice is your power, but it also means me being a support to my wife and being a voice for her when those when times come when she can't speak for herself or she doesn't have it for herself. So I will forever be a support, navigating what that looks like when he's here, what, and honestly paying attention to who I used to know, because who she was prior to being pregnant is completely different. Who I've been experiencing the last seven months is very different from who I was married to 17 years. So who she will be after Chrome is born will also be very different, be very different. Yeah, so I can't really answer that like just in just an easy way, because, one, I'm not the carrier and, two, that chemical, that scientific aspect, I won't experience. Yeah, so I don't know what it's like to lose your voice after birth.
Speaker 1:I think it. I think the way that you're sharing also speaks to moms. If you do feel like you've lost your voice, you've got to find your, you got to find your circle, you've got to find your support that can say that you can trust, that can say okay, she's going through something, let me go check on her or let me see what she needs. How can she communicate that to me and pay?
Speaker 2:attention, like, yes, pay attention. So like, if you know a personality type of a person, okay, so I'm gonna talk to your baby daddies, your husbands, your all of those people, right, tell them to listen to this episode because, um, thriving like a mother is a family. It's still family to me, and so I feel as though, for the spouse husbands, wives, whatever spouse you should pay attention to your significant other. Sometimes a significant other may not even know or realize that she's losing something, and I think it's not a loss. Right, we're not losing our voice. We're trying to figure out a new way to speak. Yeah, it's transformation.
Speaker 2:So, caught up in what we're losing when we're having a child that we need to really focus on what we're gaining and who we're shape shifting to, and what transformation looks like. Having a child is a transformation in life. It is a beautiful experience where a lot of people don't have the opportunity to experience. So if we look at it more so as a transformation versus a loss, then you will have less pressure on showing up or being perfect or whatever. The case is, in that you know transitional space and if you have a good support system, which starts in the home, most women want to seek out other women to be their support where you need to be focused on the household, because that's where the child is going to be and who will be more effective?
Speaker 1:The child yes, that is true. Let's talk about bootcamp and coaching. Yeah, we need to go there. You've been sharing so many gems with our listeners today, but I know that you already have a few tools in your toolbox that you can share with them, that they could access today or in the future.
Speaker 2:Yes, so I have a bootcamp called the Power of Conversations and the. The power of conversations is really just being able to understand. Do you want ordinary relationships or do you want extraordinary ones, an extraordinary meaning conversation? Right, the biggest flex in the world is to be able to communicate. So you talk about your voice, right? Going back to that, it's more so how we bring communication and how we have hard conversations in relationships, and most of the time people think that if you have a hard conversation, that, oh, the relationship's not going to work.
Speaker 2:That is false. That's false. You will have arguments. You will have. You will have arguments, you will have disagreements, you will have things that you'll have to go through and navigate, but how you navigate that in a, in a form of a conversation, is key. Yeah, so I teach a. I have an eight course bootcamp Now. We did four weeks, but I think we did a little bit longer than four weeks, cause I don't feel like it was long enough. Um, but I'm not really. I'm looking for people to transform their mindset when it comes to communicating. Communicating has always been grouped into a negative. It's like a negative connotation around it. No, you know, communication can be easy, it can be pleasant when even if it's something that's ugly you've got to talk about but, it's how you communicate, right?
Speaker 2:If you think about when you grew up, were you really taught how to be in relationship? Yeah, no, absolutely not Okay. And the reason is because we're all just trying to exist, we're just trying to survive, we're just trying to make it, we're trying to do all these things. But I remember sitting at the table and this was at my mama Lupe's house and, of course, we always had dinner at my mama Lupe's house and we sat at the dinner table, yeah, you know, eating our jalapenos, our tortillas, our frijoles, all those things, and we would talk, yeah, and one thing for sure we couldn't leave a table till we finished our food. But that's a whole nother thing. But, um, communication was something that we did. Now I take that sorry mike, sorry Mike, my bad, I take that as wow. That was a great way for us to bond, a great way for us to talk about things, and it was just so impactful for me.
Speaker 2:And then I realized, when I went into other environments where I didn't have it and how different the relationships were. And so this was me young, and so this is me thinking back at my younger years and where communication was and where it lacked and what that did to my relationship. So, yes, I teach off of experience, but I also very much educated when it comes to teaching people how to navigate relationships, because I've done the work, I'm certified yes, and I'm still in school. And the power of conversations bootcamp is just one of those things where I couldn't keep it to myself anymore. I had to try to create a structured environment which my followers, which my people, wanted to know what it was to understand communications and communicating better. And you took the course, yes, doing the work, maintenance, maintenance.
Speaker 1:Yeah, okay, the bootcamp. How would the bootcamp not only help a mom who you know you need to go sign up to her page? All the stuff is going to be in the show notes, um, but how can it take them? I guess this will kind of start our closing a little bit, but how can it take them from just surviving in relationships, going through the motions, and to thriving?
Speaker 2:so when I love your podcast name and I think that everybody is looking to thrive in some aspect of their life, and when you have a realization that, when you're honest with yourself, right, and you realize that it's okay to start over at whatever point that you're at Right, and I think that having community is beautiful, and when you're in I'll, I'll, you know'll ask you how I could be a part of the mom community, because that's about that time I think that women and mothers need to know that surviving is just for a season, is just for a season, and so sometimes, sometimes, we are in survival mode and we're in a survival space, because maybe that's where we're supposed to be in that moment and maybe we're supposed to learn something in that.
Speaker 2:So sit with yourself long enough to understand why you're in that space and what you're trying to take out of that experience. And what do I need to do to get to a place to thrive? We're often looking at surviving and trying. So A, b and C, you're trying to skip every other step to get to thriving. And then you realize, oh, it's not working for me, it's not working for you because you skip steps. Oh, it's not working for me, it's not working for you because you skip steps. You don't go from kindergarten to seventh grade. There are different grade levels that you have to go through to get to the seventh grade. There's different moments and different times and you're learning different things and there's a pace for a reason. So, although you may have to survive a little bit longer than the next person, first of all stop looking at where another mom is.
Speaker 1:Yeah, when another woman is.
Speaker 2:That comparison will kill you. And analyze, be honest with yourself and then figure out a strategy so that you can thrive. It's like I want women to stop and think for a second about where they are and why they're in that space and stop pointing the fingers at everybody else. Yeah, oh, he's not doing that. She's not doing that. My childhood, this, oh, and and what about you?
Speaker 1:What?
Speaker 2:about you? What about you? What about you? Yeah? Then, when you realize that, realize that, okay, let me look at myself for a second and then thriving should be your mantra, right, it should be something that you tell yourself every day I'm trying to take myself out of survive, I want to thrive, taking myself out of survive, I want to thrive, but how you get there and how you stay there, is that resilient piece? Yeah, because you can get to a space of thriving. Shoot, I thrived in 08 when I met my spouse. I was a good looking tenderoni back then. Then I had to survive for a few years. Then I thrived in 2014 when.
Speaker 2:I came to Atlanta, so there were moments where I had to survive and then there's moments where I was thriving, but what I lacked then was relational intelligence, yeah, so when you realize that you want to actually thrive and how do you stay? There is really what you should be focused on and create strategies around thriving and to stay thriving and be okay when there's a moment where you've got to survive again, because that's just real yeah, like it's gonna happen y'all, it really is it's happening and it's like okay, and give yourself grace when, when, when, when, when stuff hits the fan because you have to be okay with that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, have to, like we're so focused on and I don't want to give no false advice. You know I would be doing your listeners a disservice if I wasn't honest about what's real. You know things are going to happen. That's just the honest to God truth. Yeah, pray as God to guide you in the way that you should go. When you realize that things happen, because things happen to everybody and for those people that you follow and you think things ain't happening in the background, oh, yeah, it's happening. It's happening.
Speaker 2:So figure out what it is in a form of a strategy or hire a coach. Like, stop faking the funk and acting like you. Just can you know. Like, stop faking the funk and acting like you just can you know Therapy is great. I'm not your therapist, but you know there's certain things and the reason why I'm not going the therapy route is because I realize the type of coaching style I have is a little abrupt, but I want to keep it real with people. Yeah, people need that. And it's like come on, girl and girl, and find a strategy hire a coach, get some assistance and know that you may have to survive again.
Speaker 2:You may have to survive again. This is the reality. But you'll be tooled up.
Speaker 1:Your tool belt will be lit, you'll be ready. Okay, exactly Okay. So I want to end here. First of all, just thank you for being here. I'm just yeah, y'all don't even understand. First of all, to start having guest interviews this season on the podcast was a hurdle for me. Then saying, oh, I want to do it in person once, and then for the first person to be Jasmine. Y'all Okay, if you're not following her yet, please go follow her.
Speaker 2:All the information is going to be in the show notes and just again thank you for being here, thank you for pouring entire listeners and we can't wait for crew, oh my God. So first of all, if I may say, I have watched you evolve into who you are today, watched you evolve into who you are today. So to to know you back then and to see you hosting your own podcast is literally the like. That is what life's about, seeing it full circle, like I am honored to be here because it's it's like you have always, always supported me. You've always supported me, from day one, even though she didn't talk much.
Speaker 2:I really didn't pull it out. I had to pull it out and pull it out. I'm like hey, knock, knock, knock, I'm not leaving. Um, but I am so extremely proud of you. You know, I don't think people realize for those listeners you're just getting to know, you're getting to know E. Now. I have known E from her transformation, so when she, when there was moments where she wasn't thriving, and now to see her evolve into a podcast, like just everything that you're doing I'm so proud of and I think that people, you know you need to clap for the women at all avenues of their life. You don't just clap for them when they're down and clap for them when they're up. You got to make sure that you clap for them in any aspect of their life and I'm extremely proud. I mean, I can't even. It's like to see God work. Yes.
Speaker 2:Like in the fruit is like you're now bearing your fruit and it's just like I hope people tap in and I hope that people really see you for who you are today. Yeah, and what you're going to do for women is phenomenal, especially mothers. That's your thing, girl. I'm excited. I mean, chrome is going to be eaten, oh yeah.
Speaker 1:What was it? Six months, six months, six months, okay, avocado.
Speaker 2:Yes, avocado, they expensive. But Ebony you know she be chopping up Henry's stuff and I got to take. Now. I got to take her course Because I don't know nothing about feeding kids at six months, because you know I got to get my baby off the well she going to be breastfeeding, but I got to get my baby off the well.
Speaker 2:she's going to be breastfeeding but you know, yeah, you know, you got to interchange sweet potatoes. They said sweet potatoes. But yeah, so All the things, all the things I'm like Henry be eating, yes, he does he be eating. Yeah, I love that. I love that.
Speaker 1:Because you know they don't be, they're ready.
Speaker 2:Henry Eaton, Okay, but um no, I'm proud of you. I am so grateful to be here and, you know, taking me out of my element. What people don't know about me is I'm very shy.
Speaker 1:Yeah, they. You know I'm a little, I'm a personality, but you know.
Speaker 2:I'll be sweating you know my armpits sweating right now but, um, to get me out of my comfort zone to express and to share, which I don't really do much, I'm like, oh man, you're going to have me on camera. I can't practice, no no practice, no practice. But yeah, I'm proud of you and I can't wait and I will support you until the end, in the ends of this earth, my boo All right?
Speaker 1:Well, let the listeners know I have another show notes, but tell them where they can follow you on.
Speaker 2:Oh, you can follow me on everything at Live Love Tank L-I-V-E-L-O-V-E-T-A-N-K. Live Love Tank, love it.
Speaker 1:Thank you so much for listening love. If anything in today's episode resonated with you, share it with your bestie, or share it on social media and tag me so we can chat about it, as always, sending you light and love, and remember you are worthy, you are enough and you deserve to thrive.
